Here’s a good way to start a fight: ask a group of people what the ultimate condiment is. Team Ranch is probably the largest, Team Sriracha possibly the loudest, but I would vote for BBQ sauce. The Kansas City style, thick and based on ketchup and brown sugar is perfect for any meat or potato variant. And the best sauce to top your ribs, burgers, chicken fingers, and fries is the sauce you make yourself.

BBQ sauce is simple, and can be flavored any way you like. Honey, bacon, hickory smoke, or bourbon? Or all of the above perhaps? To illustrate the process of inventing a signature sauce, allow me to explain how I invented my own, originally for coating homemade wings. While I was inspired by honey-chipotle wing sauces, I prefer to use a combination of brown sugar and molasses to give mine a bit more depth of sweetness. But the chipotle of course stays. It gives a great kick for wings.

I started off with the standard homemade BBQ I grew up with: Ketchup, brown sugar, Worcestershire sauce, seasoned with salt, pepper, onion powder, and garlic powder. Very easy, very tasty, but we’re looking for something unique here, people!

The first variation was to reduce the amount of brown sugar to make room for some dark molasses for a deeper flavor. Then add a little bit of liquid smoke (very careful, use even a bit too much and the sauce gets a burnt taste). Then the big flavor and heat boost: some chipotle powder (or a canned chipotle in adobo sauce if you have it handy). Yumm. Simmer over the stove, then toss in your wings. Or just dip french fries in it. Or use a spoon. You do you, man!

But, there was one last variation I had to try. If you live in the land of Sheetz convenience stores, you may have encountered their Dr. Pepper BBQ sauce available as a dipping sauce for their endless variety of deep fried foods. Hmm, what would that be like? Turns out, adding a splash of cola to a slightly spicy BBQ sauce seems to increase the perceived heat. What it doesn’t do is add much flavor of its own. Welp, live and learn.

The final product is now essential for any family wing night.

While adding cola to BBQ sauce didn’t do much for me, I did discover an unusual “secret” ingredient when making BBQ’s suit and tie wearing cousin: steak sauce. I enjoy making steak at home, because it’s easy, especially if you use a smoking hot cast iron skillet. (Word to the wise: the smoking part is literal, so step one to making steak indoors is remove your smoke detector battery).

Normally I’m a strong believer in the philosophy that steak should be seasoned with only salt and pepper and enjoyed without condiments to allow maximum enjoyment of pure beef flavor. But one day I felt adventurous and decided to try steak sauce. I started with a similar base as BBQ. Next I added more of the spices and Worcestershire along with some Grey Poupon and a few dashes of Tabasco. The resulting sauce had a good zip and seemed to complement beef nicely, but it needed a bit of sweetening.

Not wanting to use plain sugar, I remembered the old party meatball recipe where you empty a bottle of chili sauce and a jar of grape jelly into a crockpot and let it cook together into a sauce. Could grape jelly work here too? After some careful heating and intense stirring to get it incorporated, the answer was: Yes!

Now, I’m sure you are wondering where the recipes are. Well, since my forms of measurement like a sploosh of this, and a pour of that, and a splash of the other thing don’t convert into standard units, all I can say is good luck. You have the basic idea, just get out a saucepan, dive in and season to taste. BBQ sauce isn’t technical like Hollandaise, it’s whatever flavors taste good to when you’re making it. And that’s what makes it great.